Ich Bin Ein Rachel Dolezal!

By Mick Dumdell

pimp Iceberg-Slim

Chances Are, Slim???

Rachel Dolezal, the white woman who pretended to be Black for several years, has been roundly criticized for her actions. She was recently fired from her position at the NAACP. If you are not aware of the details, here is a link which provides the background:


But I understand her desire to join the Black race. The overwhelming thrust of my life is to defeat the powers of racism. As such, I obsessively spend the majority of my time confronting racism and delving into the minutia of daily life to ferret out the hidden racism that nobody else sees. I can’t go to sleep at night without worrying that somewhere, somebody is thinking racist thoughts! So I pop Ambiens!

Racism is constantly on my mind, and I am unable to go to the bathroom to do Number 2 without a copy of a Mother Jones, or The Crisis.  But as a result, I believe that I am much more in tune with the fine points of racism, and what it means to be a Black man in America, than even many Black people.

There are so many times that I wish I could be Black so that I could stroll freely among the more ethnic neighborhoods without drawing the justified ire of the citizens therein against whitey.  So that I could eat fried chicken and watermelon without feeling like a racist. So that I could sing, “Mammy”, without putting on blackface, or feeling microaggressive.

But alas, I was born white, with all its many privileges, but also with all its drawbacks. The poet, William Blake, in his utterly racist and condescending 1789 poem, The Little Black Boy, came closest to expressing my feelings, when he said, and I paraphrase this a little,

My mother bore me in the northern clime,
And I am white, but O! my soul is black;
I think Black Thoughts all of the time,
And curse my melaninnic lack!

So I am with you, Sister Rachel! I dig where you are coming from! I grok you! We are simpatico! Right on! Like President Kennedy said at the Berlin Wall;

Ich bin ein Rachel Dolezal!

Yours very truly,

Mick “Spin” Dumdell


About Penelope Dreadful

An attorney, with a rye sense of humor.
This entry was posted in Mick Dumdell Posts, Racism and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Ich Bin Ein Rachel Dolezal!

  1. Nick Spinelli says:

    Great post. Dolezal is the perfect example of just how fucked our culture has become.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s